The death of the dinner table is one of the main reasons for the decay in our society today...
I am a proud 80's baby, meaning that I come from the era of neon jogging suits, Mr. Fox and 4-Square, Thundercats and The Cosby Show. My summers were spent playing outside from sunup to sundown. Yes millennials, we actually played outside as children!!! Climbing trees, stickball, and tag were normal activities for a child back then! Ice cream trucks only sold ice cream - go figure! Most importantly though, the neighborhood was a village - we knew everyone we lived around! Our parents could release us to go outside after breakfast, and rest assured that we would all return for dinner. (you just better make sure you got inside before the streetlights came on!)
See back then, the community was the nucleus of your society. As a child, if I was misbehaving a few blocks away from home, my parents knew about it by the time I got home. I couldn't hide my shortcomings or misbehaving from my family because every single night we had dinner as a family, at the dinner table. There were rules for the dinner table! Number one, you talked about your day! Parents discussed their work day, children discussed school. And it was in those discussions that families were able to find out what each person was dealing with, both good and bad.
Rule number two, you didn't hold back! As children, we didn't have a choice of what we talked about at the dinner table - you talked about everything! While I never agreed with this rule as a child, I have come to truly appreciate this as an adult. Our parents wanted us to disclose everything because it allowed them insight into our lives. It gave them the opportunity to get in front of potential issues in our lives, and to protect us and guide us through harmful situations that weren't even aware of. Rule number three, you ate what was cooked, or you didn't eat! My parents weren't cruel, they didn't purposely just prepare things that they knew we didn't like just to spite us. But they did create wholesome meals for us, and whether the vegetable of the night was broccoli or brussel sprouts, we had to eat it! While they didn't force us to eat any particular food, there was no separate meal cooked or alternative sides prepared. You either ate what was prepared, or you went to bed with a growling tummy...
That day has died - and our society is living proof of it!
Now, I'm not saying by any means that just because families don't eat at the dining room table regularly that our society has gone to the dogs. Nor am I saying that the death of the dinner table is applicable to every single family. I know of several families that still eat dinner together every night. What I am saying is that in general, our society doesn't practice this tradition anymore. And while some people don't think that it means much, I want to provide a different perspective. The dinner table has been replaced by several things. Let's take a look...
1. The TV
This one electronic device has methodically removed the family unit from the dinner table, and planted it firmly on the couch, loveseat, and Lay-Z-Boy. I don't remember ever being able to see the television set during dinner. The dining room wasn't even built within view of the television in the living room! Television was a privilege given after dinner for a short amount of time, before going to bed. Now, most people (myself included) can't even eat dinner without watching television. Most families don't even cook like they used to! It's so much more convenient to just grab some pizza or Chinese and find our favorite spot to watch our favorite show while munching on some egg rolls or a deep dish slice. TV trays, microwave dinners, and the machine of "must-see TV shows" have grown like a fungus, to infect and affect our family bonding time.
2. Social Media
Nothing has contributed more to the decay of social interaction and the dissipation of the family than social media! I cannot tell you how often I see families eating "together" and every single person is in their own world! Tablets, laptops, phones, it's literally every man for himself during dinner now. Mom on the phone with her friend (who's also ignoring their family during dinner), Dad watching a movie or SportsCenter on his laptop, sister on Snapchat, brother on Facebook, it's never-ending. And we do it all the time!!! Breakfast, lunch, dinner, even during work and school! I have seen more people lose their jobs for being on their phones and online than I can remember. The sad part is that what would have been considered ridiculous before, is now commonplace. I remember one time I was at my grandmother's house for a family meeting. She caught me playing on my phone and promptly reminded me that she would not hesitate to bust me in my head if I didn't "get off the phone and pay attention to what's going on in the real world..." We have allowed virtual entertainment to become our reality.
3. Priorities
EVERYTHING has become more important than our families...
We see that the family as we've known it is an endangered species. Nowadays, we put work, education, money, hobbies, social media, status, and everything else under the sun before our family. As a result, the family has little more than sentimental value to our children. The millennial generation has no sense of what the power of family is, because we have allowed the decreasing value of what family means to our society, to infiltrate our psyche. People just don't care about taking time out to spend time with those who truly matter most. Don't agree?
I encourage you to look at today's world. People don't even know how to engage in face-to-face conversation. Everything is a text, Tweet, Snap or post. We live with strangers. We don't know our own children, our parents. We are roommates, not family. We co-habitate, we don't live together anymore. We are complete strangers, linked by biological data only. And while it may be too late to bring the dinner table back, if we don't figure out a way to save our families from ourselves, we will all soon be captains of ships, that contain no passengers...
I'm just saying'...
TRT
